Music Lyrics/Not WLiiA/Improvaganza
This is Whoserpedia's page for Drew Carey's Improv-a-Ganza lyrics. These are from the short-lived 2011 GSN show. Bob's Call Bathing Suits Gondola Nurses Shoes Skydiving Transformers Greatest Hits Bank Manager Trainee Let's Leave the Dollar In ('60s Funk) Big Game Hunter - "I Killed It in Kenya" (Irish Ballad) Jeff: A long time ago Far far away I was out on the plains Hunting all day When what should happen to pass me But a hippo I did see? I killed him in Kenya Brad: Fiddle-dee-dee All: Fiddlee-dee-dee Jeff: I killed him in Kenya All: Fiddle-dee-dee Chip: There was an elephant I killed it so (Brad/Jeff echo: so) How it got in my pajamas I'll never know (Jeff echo: I'll never know) It had to be him For it could have been me I killed him in Kenya All: Fiddle-dee-dee Bomb Disposal Short Fuse (Disco) Dietitian - "Saturated Fat" (Bob Marley) Chip: Oh yeah! Oh no! Ow! Ow! Jonathan: Jeff: Growing up, laying in the yard I can't do no exercise, my arteries got hard Chip: Too hard! Jeff: I got so damn fat From too much, from too much All: Saturated Fat! Chip: Fat is the fat that you... Jeff: Saturated Fat! Jonathan: Satur! Ated! Satur! Ated! Chip: Polyunsaturated fat! Woooooah. Jonathan: Oh, daddyumdah when the saturated fat is not that good Cause it make you not feel good, you don't it want it, you know you should. And that is right, it's right, you eat it and you know you strollin' Don't need no saturated fat cause you want a line from mouth to your colon All: Saturated fat! Chip: '''1, 2, 3, 4, Woah! Hey Hey! Don't eat so much mayonnaise! Everybody! '''Jeff: '''I ate too many potatoes and yams Not too many saturated fat grams But if you go to the Krispy Kreme's You're going to have so much fat in between! '''Chip: '''So, don't eat the fat, the fat that's in you. '''Jonathan: '''Don't eat the fat, the fat that's in you. '''Chip: '''Can you give me one stop! '''Jonathan: '''Don't eat the fat, the fat that's in you. Don't eat the fat, the fat that's in you. '''Jeff/Jonathan: '''Saturated, saturated, saturated '''Chip: Two times! Doctor HMO (Boy Band) Executioner - "Lethal Injection" (Old School Rap) All: Yo! It's a lethal injection! What what! Jeff: MGM, get your hands up! Come on, let me see your hands up! I committed crimes in this town And now they're gonna try to lay me All: DOWN Jeff: I killed a young girl, her name was Mabel They're gonna put me on the big flat All: TABLE Jonathan: That is right, there's no intersection Ouch! My arm! A painful injection Coming at you, gonna roll a seven Uh oh, my a*** ain't going to heaven Chip: Some people are lucky, some people are not You're the kind that's not, 'cause you're 'bout to get a All: SHOT Chip: I got a new injection, it's not gonna feel good I think if you do the other kind you feel REAL good Jeff: Now the first big needle puts you out to sleep The second injection's one you don't want to keep That's the injection that tires your brain The third injection makes you feel insane Slowly, slowly you start to die The lids go down over your eye The people from the glass, watching your a** Why you getting killed? You don't have to ask! Jonathan: It's a lethal injection! Chip: What! Jonathan: It's a lethal injection! Chip: What! All: It's a lethal injection! Chip: In your butt! Jonathan: Lethal... check it check it check it check it check it! Jonathan: L to the ethal, I to the njection Uh oh! Get an erection Chip on the table, that's not nice Give it to me once! Chip: 400 CCs, 400 CCs Jonathan: TWICE! All: Lethal! Lethal! Lethal! Lethal! Chip: What you gonna do? It's a Lethal Weapon 2! Jeff: Lethal injection, you're 'bout to die. Why you gonna die? Yo, don't ask ALL: WHY Jeff: You killed 40 people and you didn't even care You mother***er, just lie down there! Chip: Shot for shot, that's the shot I got! (x2) All: Shot for shot, that's the shot I got! Chip: You think you are the lucky one, but you are not. All: Lethal injection! Lethal injection! Lethal injection! Lethal injection! Jeff: Peace! Farmer - "Dust Storm" (Jazz Ballad) Chip: Thank you all for coming down to the feed barn Jeff: Hay is half-off while we're on stage Chip: Hey! Jeff: What? Chip: Half-off! Jeff: Oh. <'Chip' prepares to sing.> Jeff : Dust STOOOOOOOORM! Dusty dusty wind. Sand... in my shoes. I can't grow a goddamn thing. Ooo what.... do I dooooooooo?? Chip: DUST storm! Chip: Windy windy dust. Jeff: Sandy teeth! Chip: Trumpet solo! <'Jeff' mimes trumpet and plays a single note> Jeff: Dust STOOOOOOOOORM! Sandy, sandy airrrrrrrrr... Chip: We should probably wear some kind of ventilating mask. Jeff: A tumbleweed just went from there... to THEEEEEERE! DUST STOOOOORM! Chip: Here comes a cyclone, just look at them I'll never find my Autie Emmmm! Jeff: There is no place like... home And no matter how far my wanderlust may roam Chip: There's something in my heart that keeps me safe and warm. It's a du... Jeff : DUST STOOOOOOOORM! DUST STOOOOOORM! Chip: It's your old trusty Not damp and musty Jeff: Gonna make your tractor tires all rustyyyyyyyy Both: It's a... Jeff : DUST Chip : DUUUUUUUUUUUUST STOOOOOORM! Gas Station Attendant Wipe the Window, Hang the Freshener, Let's Go (Electronic) Gold Miner I Chip, You Dig (Motown) Hog Farmer - "Sooie" (Country) Hog Farmer - "Our Love is Like Pork" (French) Jeff: Our love is like pork Brad: Jeff: That's what I say First you eat it, you crave it You digest it, your love goes away I fell in love with you, my pig, you were the only one for me When I said, "Do you want me," You would say, "Sooo, oui oui!" Sooo, oui oui! Chip: Sooo, oui oui! Jeff: Sooo, oui oui! Chip: Sooo, oui oui! Our love was so nice, our love was so sweet Our love was the other white meat I know you think I'm a jerk But I love, I love my little pork Brad: '''Tell me... what you want me to do. '''Jeff: He's singing! Shut the f*** up! Brad: '''I want you to be my barbecue! '''Chip: My barbecue... Brad: '''Your love comes dripping off my fork For you are the love that I love and I truly love pork '''Jeff: '''Oh, love is like pork! '''Chris: '''Oh! '''Jeff: It's your one and your all It's seems so right and yet it's filled with so much cholesterol! Chris: And what will I do when my piggy is gone? Au revoir, la petit cauchon! Brad: ''' '''Jeff: '''And when love, like pork, is finally through I'll just say, "that'll do, pig!" '''All: "That will do!" Lawyer Objection Overruled (Reggae) Lumberjack - "Flap My Jack" (Tunes for Tots) Jeff: Good evening, boys and girls. Chip: G'day! Jeff: We've got a song to sing for you, and if you know the chorus, you can sing along. Chip: This one's a cracker, so everybody's gonna have a good time! Am I right? Jeff: Where are you from? Chip: I don't know. Jeff: Wow! What's the name of the song? I've already forgotten, because I have been drinking! Chip: Can you kids say drinking? Jeff: Oh, "Flap My Jack?" Chip: Oh yes! Jeff: "Flap My Jack!" Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Jeff: Ker-flop! Chip: We've got one cake on the bottom On top and in the middle You pour a little batter And you put it on the griddle And then you're all done If you want more you can come back So everybody flippity flap And you can flap my jack! Chip and Jeff: Flippity flap, flippity flap Jeff alone: Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Chip: Oh yes! Both: Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Jeff: Everybody now! Both: Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Chip: That's right! Jeff: Just you, sir! Audience Member: Flippity flap, flippity flap, flippity flap Jeff: NO! WRONG! Flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody needs a good breakfast in the day. Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack And don't take my butter away! Chip: The batter, the batter Soft as silk The batter, the batter, Is buttermilk! The batter, the batter, The better the batter, the bitter the batter, the batter the bitter, the batter, the batter... PLAY BALL! Jeff: Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Everybody now! Jeff/Chip/Greg/Ryan: Flippity flap, flippity flap Put a pancake on the stack Everybody flap my jack! Real Estate Mi Casa (Latin) There's a Leak in the Bathroom and There's Only One Bedroom, Oh My (Funk) Steel Worker Our Love is Like Hot Rivets in the Pants (Mambo) Blowing My Stack ('70s Rock) Stockbroker - "Bailout" (Memphis Soul) Jeff and Chip: Huh! Yeah! Jeff: I gotta fix the stand! Hey! Scream and shout! Let me hear you wail "bailout!" I said, hey! Scream and shout! When I stay "wail," you all gonna bail me out. I gotta fix the stand! Chip: Well, Imma gonna go to a fancy jail And my company's too big to fail The government will help me, no no doubt Uncle Sam is gonna bail me out. Bail me out! Jeff: Baby, I know most of you's poor A guy named Madoff made off with your door Oh baby, when it rains it can hair Come on and bail! Chip and Jeff: You've got to bail! Bail me out! You've got to bail! Got to bail me out! Chip: I know that life can be risky When you put your money down There's a lot of people that you can cheat Hollywood all around! Jeff: Chip, let me see you go all the way down Bail it out, Chip! Bail it out, bail it out to the ground! Chip: Jeff: Let me hear you wail and shout When I say "bail," you say bail me out! Chip: I said "bail!" "Bail me out! I said bail! Bail me out! One more, I said bail! Bail me out! Jeff: Just you! Bail! Audience member: "Bail me out!" Jeff: Very special! Chip: Listen, I've gotta go to prison now. We don't want to go to prison. But we've got to go to prison! You've been a great audience! One of these days you're gonna send your money; you're gonna send your taxes; and you're gonna bail me out! Jeff and Chip: You're gonna baaaaaail... Bail me out! Stripper - "You Gotta Tip Me a Twenty" (Elizabethan) Chip: '''Hey nonny nonny and a yo ho ho '''Jonathan: '''Sha la la la la '''Jeff: '''With a nonny nonny hey and a shonny nonny na '''Chip: '''Nonny nonny '''Jonathan: '''Sha la la la la '''Jeff: '''Hey there, Mr., hey there, son Don't give me nickels, don't give me a one If you want to tip me, you'd better give me plenty Tip me twenty '''Chip: '''If you want me to lose these pantaloons You'd best go get your gold dubloons I know that you haven't got any So be gone cause you can't tip... me... twenty '''Jeff and Jonathan: '''Nonny nonny nonny nonny hey ho '''Jonathan: Well you've definitely got something going on And I hate to say that stripper is his mom '''All: '''Hey nonny nonny nonny '''Jeff: '''If it's gold and it's money that you all lack Don't throw it on the stage; you can stick it in my crack. Everybody out there give me many many If you're going to tip me, tip me.... '''Chip and Jonathan: '''Twenty '''Jeff: '''Sha la la la la la looo la laaa! Unemployed I'm Growing Weed (Motown) Kick It Exotic Dancing Nail Technician Tooth Collector Song Styles